When Even is Therapy?

Therapy, for many, remains a bit of a mystery and oftentimes as a psychotherapist I get told “I'm not really sure what I'm supposed to say” and other statements that reflect a need for more mental health education. So, what is therapy and what should you expect?

Well, first of all, who can go to therapy? The answer is anyone, really. You don't need a diagnosis or to have experienced a trauma. Some go to therapy when changing jobs, going through life transitions, or may go to help navigate a divorce or a relationship change. The reason is not what's important, it's how things are impacting you internally. If you feel empty at this new job, talking to someone might help! Therapy offers a non-biased, empathetic, third party to help support someone through a difficult journey, not just a place to heal trauma or maintain stability alongside a serious mental health diagnosis.

Once you decide you might want to try therapy the next step can often be the most overwhelming. How do I find a therapist? For physical health, we know what type of doctor to call, but what about mental health providers? There are places to go to help explore what provider might be right for you. Psychology Today provides users with a guide to who is nearby as well as what they specialize in and how they operate. This can be used to get an idea if a specific provider could be a good fit. Another thing to keep in mind is the purpose you are seeking services. If you are hoping to increase parenting skills then you may look for a provider that specializes in parenting and families. If you need a therapist who uses a specific therapy, their bios or webpage should provide information to help you make an informed decision.

After finding a therapist you like, many find themselves unsure of what to expect. There are some general things to keep in mind when reaching out. This service is for you, not us. Ask what the cost will be with insurance, ask how long it may take or the tools that may be used. You should feel welcome to ask questions about a practice or provider to further explore if they are a good fit for you. Second, there is no “A” in therapy. There is no way to grade someone and honestly that would just add too much work! If you are feeling pressure to progress, talk to your therapist about that. Therapy does not have a timeline and each individual will have a different therapeutic journey.

Lastly, keep in mind that although we are the experts in emotional awareness, brain function and other human conditions, we are never the expert in you. We do not have to leave the office and live your life, you do. Here are some things to ask yourself to determine if your therapist is a good fit:

Do they challenge me?

Do they check in with me?

Do they guide me to my goals?

Do they help me learn?

Do they show me acceptance and compassion?

Do they treat me as an equal?

And as you decide what is best for you, remember, getting started is the best place to start.

Madison Youlden, MSW, SWLC

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